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Even If It Hurts Like Hell

My friend.

 

My heart hurts a lot right now.

And I want to make something blatantly clear to you.

 

If God calls you to something, if He calls you to do something, to move somewhere, to give up something, to leave something….

It doesn’t mean that it’s going to be an easy, joyful, light, delightful process.

 

Yes, it’s God calling you.

Yes, He is the God of joy.

He is the God of light burdens, the God of delight.

 

But my friend,

We are human. This world is still broken. Our hearts are still not at home.

It’s okay that it’s hard.

It’s okay that it hurts like hell.

It’s okay that you feel pain, it’s okay that you are having a really hard time.

It’s okay that you miss people and places and community.

It’s okay that your heart is crying out in agony because you don’t understand.

 

My friend, it’s okay.

Just because it’s God calling you, it doesn’t mean that the pain and hardness are extinguished.

It just means that you can have faith that it’s all going to be worth it.

That it’s the right thing to do.

That there’s joy ahead, even if there’s pain now.

 

That’s where I’m currently at.

For my friends who know, I recently and rather spontaneously dropped out of college.

It’s been a brutal time working through the fact that I won’t be back with my friends in two weeks. That I won’t be going with them to coffee shops virtually every day. That I won’t be at basketball games, that I won’t be with them downtown, that I won’t be there in the midst of beautiful memory making.

But.

Just because I feel the pain, just because it’s hard..

It doesn’t mean I am making the wrong decision.

My dear sister, hear me when I say this: The pain, the hard time, the agony does not mean you are making the wrong decision.

 

The pain you feel shows that your heart was poured out. The agony you are experiencing shows that you were fully invested, fully planted in where God had you.

But now, your sweet Jesus is calling you onward.

So onward you must go.

 

I can’t imagine it was easy for Simon (Peter) and Andrew when they heard Jesus say, “Follow me.” In between those two lines of text is two people leaving their home, their family, their friends, their job, their routine, their pets….. everything.

But after those two lines of text is a story of blessing because of faithfulness. It’s the story of two people who would never regret following Jesus. It’s the story of what Jesus does with a life sweetly surrendered to Him.

 

I know with all of my heart that God has a beautiful season up ahead.

But you’re not going to see it, you’re not going to understand just yet. It will take time.

But now, my sister, trust. Trust Him.

When you look Jesus in the eyes, you know those eyes of fire are burning for you. They are burning for His bride. He loves us.

We can trust Him with the deepest parts of our hearts.

 

I promise you that at the gates of Heaven, you will regret nothing.

I remind you, that grace carried you here and grace will carry you on.

He loves you. He loves you. He loves you.

 

Keep pouring yourself out. Keep giving your heart away. Keep loving deeper than you ever thought you could.

For the Filler of your heart is overflowing. And He never runs dry.

His strength is deeper than our weakness, and His joy is fuller than our agony.

He’s the King of Kings. Why would you expect anything less?

 

I believe in you, sister. You can do hard things in the sweet name of Jesus.

With much, much love. And a deep grace carrying me on. -Melissa

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29 thoughts on “Even If It Hurts Like Hell

  1. You always seem to write just what i need to hear when i need to hear it. I appreciate your blog and am so glad i found it.

    Truly, thank you & blessings to you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Serena,
      So glad you enjoy the posts. I completely understand the seasons that hurt like hell. Yes- love that last line- it’s a just a season. Let me know if I can be praying for you in any way, my friend!

      Much love!

      Like

  2. I am eager and excited to find out why God called you to drop out of college and even more excited for you to reap the blessings. A similar situation happened to me, this time, last year. Without getting into details; what I knew God had closed the door on caused me to be sad, scared, confused, disappointed, and angry but now… God has QUADRUPLED what I had to let go of. I am way more happy and joyful in all I am doing now than I would have ever been if I didn’t listen to my heavenly father last summer. Now I feel guilty for ever being sad if I could have only seen what was coming. I can’t wait to hear what God has in store for you, his faithful and loyal daughter. Be patient my sister.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Bella,
      Wow. Loved this so much. This was so encouraging. It’s comforting knowing that you were in this place, and hearing you say how in that time you were sad, but now you see that God has quadrupled everything and that you are joyful and happy. This soothed my heart more than you know, thank you for that! MUCH LOVE to you, my sister!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Thank you. Thank you so much for this. I recently transferred schools and am missing my old school and friends dearly. Perhaps the hardest part has been knowing I’m not present for all the new memories being made. Thank you for shedding your light and reminding anyone in a similar situation that we aren’t alone. God works through you in amazing ways, thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Maggie,
      So glad this post touched your heart. I completely understand the feelings of missing friends and places! You are right- we are not alone! Praying God would draw you close to Him and deeply into all of the great things at your new school with new people! Much love, my friend!

      Like

  4. Wow! This is only the second post I read from you, as I have just found your blog. But all I can say is how blessed I am to have found your blog! Both posts couldn’t have been more relatable for me in a time where I really need to be reminded of how amazing God is. I like to think my relationship with Christ is strong, but I also get caught up in the chaos of the world- material things, jealousy, and a constant longing for more stuff. I recently just packed up and moved to a new state for a job. I left behind my close friends and family. Nothing about this move has been easy. While the new city, new workplace, and new environment are a lot to take in, I’m constantly reminded that God has brought me where I am for a reason. It’s a hard journey, but I know God knows what he is doing. Thanks again for your beautiful posts. I look forward to reading more. Blessings to you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ashlyn,
      So glad that you stumbled across my blog! So thrilled that you relate to those two posts- God always gives us love and encouragement at just the right moments! He loves you so dearly! It’s so easy to just kind of take a step back into the world, without even realizing it- I completely understand that. But God is always so faithful to draw us near again and bind our wandering hearts to His! And wow- big move! I’m sure it’s been hard having “new” everything.. a quote I love says, “We can endure change by pondering God’s permanence.” He is the one, constant Rock when everything else is shifting. He’s brought you here for a reason, yes, keep trusting Him my sister! He is so close to you. Much love to you!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. AWH so glad that you stumbled across this post… and so glad that it touched your heart. Praying for your heart to feel His sweet love wrapped around you, and His strength leading you forward! Much love, my friend!

      Like

  5. God bless you sweet child. I am currently in and I believe near the end of a season of great turmoil myself. Two years ago, my husband and I stepped out on faith and started our own business. God provided in every way and has blessed us beyond our greatest imagination. Was it scary, YES – but when God’s hand guided and provided at those times when we didn’t know the next step, His blessings far exceeded. Today, I believe God is dealing with me to leave a government job of almost 18 years to work in the business He has has blessed us with. There are unknowns that cause me to hesitate the transition. Will you pray with me to gain the faith to step out of my comfort and trust again the power of our Father to provide? Thank you sister in Christ.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Debbie,
      What an amazing story! Such a story of God’s faithfulness. And when everything is crazy and unsure and we are nervous and hesitant…we can look back and see that He was faithful then, and He will be faithful yet. I am praying for God to bless you and your husband in every way- physically and spiritually, and that He would lead you closer to His heart in this time! Let me know how everything goes- I would love to hear! Much love, my friend!

      Like

  6. So beautifully written! love when I come across another blogger who isn’t afraid to talk about the real, gritty yuck of this life because she knows it doesn’t diminish the real, incredible goodness of her God! Keep it up, girl!

    Liked by 1 person

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