I want Jesus. But, also a husband. And kids. And a job. And an apartment. And, maybe a dog.

I want Jesus to come back.

I want to see Him, unveiled, face to face.

I want to live in the Kingdom illuminated by His glory and paved by streets of gold.

I want to experience Jesus’ perfect goodness, His deeper goodness.

 

But, I also want to get engaged. I want to experience the moment when that guy gets down on one knee and pops that long-awaited question, “Will you marry me?”

I want to get married. I want to plan my wedding, I want to pick out my dress, the flowers, the bridesmaids dresses, and I want to walk down the aisle, and finally say, “I do.”

I want to have kids. I want to experience pregnancy and pick out baby names and decorate the nursery with light blue or gentle pink.

I want to tell my kids about Jesus and treasure the sweet moments of tucking them in, making them breakfast, asking them how their day was after school.

I want to graduate college and strive to get a real-world, full time job. (Okay, confession, I just want to dress business-casual and walk in with a latte every day.)

I want to travel; I want to get my first apartment; I want to have dinner parties; I want to experience the things that our hearts hope for here in this life.

 

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting those things.

I mean, our sweet Jesus put certain passions and desires in our hearts, like marriage, and motherhood, and community.

But, I think the trouble comes when we want those things more than we want Jesus.

That used to be me.

 

It’s hard, friends. It’s really hard. My heart was so convicted about this.

The idea of engagement, of marriage, of kids, of jobs, of life in general just seemed SO sweet. And so good. And so satisfying.

But the Lord has laid this on my heart: those things all simply point us to Jesus.

Jesus is the point of it all.

And Jesus is the giver of it all.

 

Jesus gives us marriage to show us a glimpse of Christ’s devotion to his Church. The male, the protector, the leader is like Christ. The female, the bride, is like the Church. Unconditional love. Relentless pursuit. Fullness of intimacy. Jesus and Church.

Jesus gives us little kiddos to show us a glimpse of the Father’s love for us. The way mommies and daddies love their kids is but a small example of how the Father loves us.

Jesus gives us friends and community to encourage each other, to love each other as brothers and sisters in Christ, to carry each other’s burdens, and to walk each other home: to our heavenly home.

 

The desire for these things is good. It really is. Our sweet Jesus can totally be glorified in all of these things.

But we have to understand that ultimately, it’s all about Jesus, it’s all because of Jesus, it’s all for Jesus.

 

Friends, hear this: When the reality of how completely and utterly satisfying Jesus Christ really is, our hearts will yearn for Him.

In the shadow of Jesus Christ’s sweetness, everything else in the world seems surprisingly bland.

In the shadow of Jesus Christ’s light, everything else in the world seems oddly faded.

In the shadow of Jesus Christ’s promises, everything else in the world seems rather fleeting.

Things like marriage, kids, community, traveling are still good, and our hearts will surely find joy in them. But Jesus will just seem more vivid. Brighter. More promising. More satisfying. Deeper. Fuller. More abundant.

 

It’s not about trying to change your heart. It’s not even about priorities, or work, or striving.

It’s about giving your heart to Jesus, and asking him to work in it.

It’s about asking Jesus to show your heart even a glimpse of His sweetness and love.

Because, friends, once we have tasted the glory of Jesus, our hearts will never turn back.

Things will effortlessly fall into the role they are supposed to be:

We will desire marriage, and kids, and traveling, and community. But our hearts will just desire Jesus more.

 

And then, one day, we will just find ourselves saying, “Jesus, come.”

One day, we will just find ourselves understanding the glory that awaits us.

We will long to live in a world with no pain, or discomfort, or mourning. We will long to live in a world where our bodies are restored, and where we can run and not faint. We long to live in a world where our sweet Jesus’ presence is truly, truly unveiled right before our eyes.

It’s a work of the Spirit in our hearts.

 

Sisters, I want to see my guy get on one knee, look into my eyes, and ask me to marry him. (Preferably at night, with city lights in the background, a circular ring.)

Sisters, I want to go wedding dress shopping (sweetheart neckline, sleek top, but some volume on the bottom) and chose the flower arrangements (peonies all the way) and walk down the aisle (lined with flower petals, of course).

Sisters, I want my own little babies (Maverick and Ava), and maybe even a black and white spotted Pomeranian. (Not that I’ve planned it out, or anything.)

But above all of that, I want Jesus.

 

This world isn’t our home. We are foreigners, actually citizens of Heaven.

We have tasted the sweetness of Jesus, like at your favorite gelato shop you can taste the new flavor on a little spoon. But we haven’t gotten the full scoop yet. It’s still coming. We are still waiting, yearning, hoping.

I want my big ‘ol scoop of gelato. (Salted caramel mixed with decadent dark chocolate, please.)

I want my big ‘ol hunk of Jesus.

But, we wait. And pray that He would come soon, like really soon.

 

SO Jesus, come. Come quickly. Because I know that You are so much sweeter than everything of this earth. Because, Your alone satisfy my heart. My soul longs for You.

And, friends, we all say AMEN!

 

With much, much love. And little spoonful of hope. -Melissa

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