I want Jesus. But, also a husband. And kids. And a job. And an apartment. And, maybe a dog.

I want Jesus to come back.

I want to see Him, unveiled, face to face.

I want to live in the Kingdom illuminated by His glory and paved by streets of gold.

I want to experience Jesus’ perfect goodness, His deeper goodness.


But, I also want to get engaged. I want to experience the moment when that guy gets down on one knee and pops that long-awaited question, “Will you marry me?”

I want to get married. I want to plan my wedding, I want to pick out my dress, the flowers, the bridesmaids dresses, and I want to walk down the aisle, and finally say, “I do.”

I want to have kids. I want to experience pregnancy and pick out baby names and decorate the nursery with light blue or gentle pink.

I want to tell my kids about Jesus and treasure the sweet moments of tucking them in, making them breakfast, asking them how their day was after school.

I want to graduate college and strive to get a real-world, full time job. (Okay, confession, I just want to dress business-casual and walk in with a latte every day.)

I want to travel; I want to get my first apartment; I want to have dinner parties; I want to experience the things that our hearts hope for here in this life.


I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting those things.

I mean, our sweet Jesus put certain passions and desires in our hearts, like marriage, and motherhood, and community.

But, I think the trouble comes when we want those things more than we want Jesus.

That used to be me.


It’s hard, friends. It’s really hard. My heart was so convicted about this.

The idea of engagement, of marriage, of kids, of jobs, of life in general just seemed SO sweet. And so good. And so satisfying.

But the Lord has laid this on my heart: those things all simply point us to Jesus.

Jesus is the point of it all.

And Jesus is the giver of it all.


Jesus gives us marriage to show us a glimpse of Christ’s devotion to his Church. The male, the protector, the leader is like Christ. The female, the bride, is like the Church. Unconditional love. Relentless pursuit. Fullness of intimacy. Jesus and Church.

Jesus gives us little kiddos to show us a glimpse of the Father’s love for us. The way mommies and daddies love their kids is but a small example of how the Father loves us.

Jesus gives us friends and community to encourage each other, to love each other as brothers and sisters in Christ, to carry each other’s burdens, and to walk each other home: to our heavenly home.


The desire for these things is good. It really is. Our sweet Jesus can totally be glorified in all of these things.

But we have to understand that ultimately, it’s all about Jesus, it’s all because of Jesus, it’s all for Jesus.


Friends, hear this: When the reality of how completely and utterly satisfying Jesus Christ really is, our hearts will yearn for Him.

In the shadow of Jesus Christ’s sweetness, everything else in the world seems surprisingly bland.

In the shadow of Jesus Christ’s light, everything else in the world seems oddly faded.

In the shadow of Jesus Christ’s promises, everything else in the world seems rather fleeting.

Things like marriage, kids, community, traveling are still good, and our hearts will surely find joy in them. But Jesus will just seem more vivid. Brighter. More promising. More satisfying. Deeper. Fuller. More abundant.


It’s not about trying to change your heart. It’s not even about priorities, or work, or striving.

It’s about giving your heart to Jesus, and asking him to work in it.

It’s about asking Jesus to show your heart even a glimpse of His sweetness and love.

Because, friends, once we have tasted the glory of Jesus, our hearts will never turn back.

Things will effortlessly fall into the role they are supposed to be:

We will desire marriage, and kids, and traveling, and community. But our hearts will just desire Jesus more.


And then, one day, we will just find ourselves saying, “Jesus, come.”

One day, we will just find ourselves understanding the glory that awaits us.

We will long to live in a world with no pain, or discomfort, or mourning. We will long to live in a world where our bodies are restored, and where we can run and not faint. We long to live in a world where our sweet Jesus’ presence is truly, truly unveiled right before our eyes.

It’s a work of the Spirit in our hearts.


Sisters, I want to see my guy get on one knee, look into my eyes, and ask me to marry him. (Preferably at night, with city lights in the background, a circular ring.)

Sisters, I want to go wedding dress shopping (sweetheart neckline, sleek top, but some volume on the bottom) and chose the flower arrangements (peonies all the way) and walk down the aisle (lined with flower petals, of course).

Sisters, I want my own little babies (Maverick and Ava), and maybe even a black and white spotted Pomeranian. (Not that I’ve planned it out, or anything.)

But above all of that, I want Jesus.


This world isn’t our home. We are foreigners, actually citizens of Heaven.

We have tasted the sweetness of Jesus, like at your favorite gelato shop you can taste the new flavor on a little spoon. But we haven’t gotten the full scoop yet. It’s still coming. We are still waiting, yearning, hoping.

I want my big ‘ol scoop of gelato. (Salted caramel mixed with decadent dark chocolate, please.)

I want my big ‘ol hunk of Jesus.

But, we wait. And pray that He would come soon, like really soon.


SO Jesus, come. Come quickly. Because I know that You are so much sweeter than everything of this earth. Because, Your alone satisfy my heart. My soul longs for You.

And, friends, we all say AMEN!


With much, much love. And little spoonful of hope. -Melissa


I would love to hear from you!

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252 replies to “I want Jesus. But, also a husband. And kids. And a job. And an apartment. And, maybe a dog.

  1. As someone who has been burnt out on God for quite some time now I jus want to say thank you for helping me fall back in love with Jesus. I needed to hear that it’s okay to want a husband, kids, and a successful career but that above all else to want God. Thank you for making this so relateable!

    Liked by 6 people

    1. It is nice to know that others also know that it’s ok to want all these other things while I still want God most of all. Happy for you Delana!!!

      Liked by 2 people

    2. Very real. Thank you. “The giver of it all” – this is our Lord – keep your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. No other way works. God bless Nanette


  2. Hi Melissa,
    This article hits home for me with exactly what I have been struggling with. Lately I have been desiring to get married, but then I think about Jesus coming back and secretly hope that I can get married before he comes. Also, I think about heaven and how there isn’t going to be marriage and it causes me to not get excited about heaven. I know that heaven is going to far better than anything we can imagine and that being there with Jesus is what my heart has been truly longing for. Is there anything that you did to help you with desiring Jesus/heaven more than the idea of marriage and everything else? Do you have any advice for this?
    Thank you for your wisdom and your encouragement!


    1. Vivian!
      Girl, I feel you. I completely understand where you’re coming from. Especially in a culture that is so indignant on the idea of marriage… it’s hard to keep your heart in the right place. But, man Jesus cares about us and our hearts. I recently was talking to a friend about this, about how I felt like I secretly wanted to get married before the Lord comes back, and said this: “We won’t even think about that once we get to Heaven! We won’t even look back!” That really comforted me- dwelling on the fact that although we don’t know the goodness that awaits us in Heaven, that we can trust that it will be SO good that we will never even think about our trivial desires from this life. Heaven will be so good that we won’t look back!
      Also, it’s a heart issue. And I have found, that with heart issues, we can’t change them ourselves.- it’s the Spirit’s work!
      Praying that Jesus would give you (and me!) a glimpse of His goodness, so our hearts would desperately seek Him above all. AND praying that Jesus would be glorified in the desires HE puts in your heart- (marriage!)
      Much, much love Vivian!

      One more thing: The guy you marry should point you closer to Jesus, and constantly be reminding you that Jesus is our ultimate lover. Wait for that guy!


    2. Hi Vivian! I struggled for a long time with this as well! I found that once I stopped focusing on MY wants and MY desires but rather focused on serving Christ and others I was able to be comforted by His love. It by no means took away those desires, but it replaced the sadness of being single, not having kids, etc with His joy. I focused my energy on what I could do for Christ in that moment. Anytime I felt myself sliding into the jealousy of a friends relationship or sadness that a friend just got engaged I stopped…thought about how I could refocus my energy to something else. So I would call and check in on another single friend of mine. Or pray for someone I knew needed pray. Anything to take the focus off of me and onto Him. Over time I realized, I wasn’t anxious or sad about being single but rather excited to use my singleness for Him. This post is exactly what so many women need to hear, thanks for sharing your heart Melissa! And Vivian, we will never meet, but know I am praying for you by name.


      Liked by 1 person

    3. Vivian–I struggled with this prior to finding my husband and getting married also. And here’s how I finally had peace with it: God designed marriage, God designed sex b/w a husband & wife, God designed the family—as great as all of that is–Heaven is so much more! God designed Heaven for us, His children, as our final destination, with HIM! Our little minds can’t fathom something better than marriage, children, and a family–but God can! Once we get to heaven, we will know. Then we will see how sweet and awesome being in the presence of God is. We will receive the prize. The prize is better than the race. Its what you strive for. Its what propels you to race faster to the end. That prize is Jesus. I promise you–being with HIM will be far better than 1 day on earth with the best husband and kids you could imagine. I know exactly how you feel! I felt the exact same way! And i think that’s completely NORMAL! God knows we can’t see what all is in store for us in Heaven. He knows you desire a family/husband. If He does return before you get to experience that–I know you will not look back with regrets. His ways are perfect. God bless you!!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Your love for jesus is incredible. I want to give you children and fix you a mocha latte every morning. I want to get down on one knee, look you in the eye, and say “i love you almost as much as jesus.”

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is an amazing piece, and I’ve been practically touched by it in so many ways that it’s difficult to turn it into words. Jesus is our savior but sometimes our feelings inside us can become confused and we can think we like something that we actually don’t. That’s why we experiment (college?) LOL.
    I think this was a great illustration of the lords love for us, I talk to him every night in my bed before I go to sleep and he shows me so many new things and opens my eyes to many things that I didn’t think was possible for a man of my convictions.
    Anyways thanks for the read, I appreciate the deep thought!


  5. Thanks for your post! I have felt shamed by my fellow single friends for desiring a husband. I hear over and over again that I should be completely content in Christ, not yearning for anything more. And then I realized that my desire for a husband is God-given! There’s nothing wrong with that as long as it doesn’t trump my desire to seek my Savior more. Your post is a breath of fresh air at this point in my life.


    1. Adrienne! Wanting a husband is nothing to be ashamed about- God gives us the gift us marriage and He can be so glorified in it! You are SO right- there is nothing wrong with that as long as it doesn’t come before your desire to seek Jesus. Amen! Thanks for your encouragement, much love!


  6. This was so real…. Our human yearnings are natural, good, and expected because we are HIS creation, but HE wants us to yearn more for HIM. My heart was truly touched by your writing….


  7. Thank you so much for sharing your story. This has been on my heart for a while, trying to seek and put Jesus first. This article will help me on my path to pursue Jesus first. I’m saving this article for sure!


  8. This gives me so much peace. For so long, I would pray asking Jesus to wait until I got married or had a career before He came back. I felt absolutely horrible about it too. Reading this gave me an entirely new perspective. My goal this year is to fall deeper in love with Jesus than ever before, and this article pushed me toward that. Thank you so much for your encouragement.


  9. Excellent. He knows the desires of your heart also… He spoke things into being in you. He understands this all. Great article. Thank you for this blessing and reminding me that 40 years ago I asked for the same things.. My mom died when I was young and I was so afraid I would die young too, but our Lord in His infinite grace has allowed me to have a good marriage, to have two children here and one who is with Him in heaven, I have seen my daughters grow and I have planned weddings for them. I have held my grandchildren… Yes, we serve a living God who understands and blesses us even when it doesn’t seem like a blessing. DAF


    1. DAF, thank you for sharing this. It is so true that He knows the desires of our hearts, and I am praising God for all that He has given you in this life. How much more is to come in Heaven! Thank you for your encouragement, it means so much. Much love to you!!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I am at this point in my life. I have a wonderful Godly husband and two beautiful little girls and while I want them to grow up and dress them for prom, see them fall in love, get married and be happy in life I want to see Jesus return so much more!!! I dream about my little family being called up to meet him. Oh how happy I would be to know we are all going together to meet him!!! To know we don’t have to part anymore or worry for each other anymore. To know my children and husband are completely safe and my nephew will be able to walk and talk when he makes it home. He’ll have no more pain or seizures or scary prognosis given from earthly physicians. But much more than all that to see the one who died for me who made it all possible!!! To feel his peace and worship him forever!!! Is there a shouting in praise emoticon??? When he comes will be the happiest day of my life if he comes during my life time!! If you don’t like shoutin don’t get on my cloud!!! Praise his sweet name!!


    1. Samantha,
      All I can say is AMEN! I LOVE your passion and I can feel your genuine excitement from this comment. Everything you said is so true- the very essence of hope! Yes, knowing your family will all be in the loving care of affection of Jesus is the most comforting feeling to be known. And yes, the thought of your nephew walking and talking- amazing! I wish there was a shouting praise emoticon! This would be an appropriate time for that!
      I am so blessed by this comment. Thank you so much, it means more than you know.
      Much love!!


  11. Christina, I love your heart!! Sometimes in the struggles of life, we forget about the “sweetness” of Jesus!! I remember in college years ago going through similar struggles and finding that sweet peace only He can give. You are an amazing young lady and I can’t wait to see what God has for you today and in the days to come!! Matt. 6:33

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I just started classes last week and the very first class I have on Tuesdays and Thursdays is called Prayer Practice (I go to Lincoln Christian University and the professor of the class is Neal Windham… Just a little background for you!). The first thing we talked about, aside from the syllabus, is prayer and desires. Man, that was a much needed class time. We talked about how our desires aren’t all bad. Some of them are desires that God has given us. I also really want to get married. That is a desire that I have had since I was a wee child. My deepest desire is to be close to God, but I have others that I know that aren’t bad, like getting married, having kids, housing 2-3 cats, having my own little place to call home here on earth. I LOVED reading this and it is just what I needed for affirmation. Now, I have to practice patience and continue to love Jesus with my entire being. Thanks!


    1. Ronette, I absolutely loved your comment! Yes, God gives us desires and can be glorified in them- marriage especially! I love that you want to get married, have cats, and have your own home. Love it! I am so glad enjoyed the article, much love to you!!


  13. To think I wasn’t even gonna click on your blog in the first place. But I’m so glad I did, thank you for such encouraging words!

    I always catch myself “what’s the point of all this” and for the longest time, I have been searching for a legit answer to that question and you answered it! Jesus is the point of it all and thank you making me opening my perspective on everything. God has consistently reminded this week that I just need to be patient and wait for his timing! Thanks again!


    1. Selena,
      I am glad you clicked on it, too! I am so glad that the Lord has used this blog in your life. Yes, Jesus is the point of everything, & waiting on His timing always is best!! Thank you for your encouragement, it means so much! Much love!


  14. It is so amazing to see someone has written perfectly what I have been thinking and that understands a woman’s point of view in desiring such things, but also revealing the correct answer to it inspired by the Holy spirit.



  15. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I could not have read this at a more perfect time. As a woman in my mid 30s, I’ve heard all kinds of reasons why I’ve yet to be married. I’ve even been asked what’s wrong with me. This post was refreshing to read and encouraged me. I know God will continue to bless you, and I hope you get that perfect engagement in the near future!


    1. Jenny,
      Wow, thank you so much for your raw vulerability! Girl, I don’t sweet Jesus wants to share your heart with anyone else. Seriously- He calls you to be His. I am so glad you were encouraged by this post- also, thank you for encouraging me.
      Much love to you, sister!


  16. I absolutely love what u said. It is very encouraging. And it is great to know that other people are feeling the same as I am.
    I would love to receive email notifications about post please. And thank you!!!


  17. I’m not sure if my first post made it. But I absolutely love what you said. Im so glad that I am not the only one who is feeling that way.
    I would love to receive emails about ur post post please.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. As a single woman & mentor of young ladies, this blog is very refreshing & needed for single women- and even men- today! I cannot wait to share this with my teen class at church on Wednesday night as we discuss the Word of God & apply it to real life issues. Thanks for your contribution to HEALTHY KINGDOM DESIRES!


  19. This really touched my heart. In so many ways, you said the very words that have been in my heart lately. Thank you for being REAL and letting God lead you.


    1. Chelsi,
      I am so joyful that this blog post spoke to your heart. The Lord is so faithful, and is working in amazing ways! Thanks for the kind words and encouragement- it means so much! So much love to you!


  20. Coming from a fellow blogger, I so enjoyed your post! I totally understand your point of view! Love this post so much! I have found myself desiring that Jesus returns, but then in a sense adding stipulations in my own desires like that he can’t come back until this and that happens. I desire to be married, have a dog, have a family, but my desire and passion for Jesus has to be more and has to be okay that if my greatest desire is Jesus, I will be satisfied regardless. Thank you for this post!


  21. Reblogged this on a Southern Social and commented:
    This morning I was sent this blog by a friend. I believe Jesus puts certain people in our lives to speak to us. Like this says it all point back to him and everything is for his glory. This is so true and has changed my outlook on a lot of thing. Even so come, Lord Jesus come.


  22. Thank you for this. I wanted all those things and wasn’t sure if I was supposed to. I’ve fallen in love with my best friend, but wasn’t sure if that was okay. I have such a strong desire to get to know Jesus and understand His will for me. I wanted all of those things, but I wasn’t sure if Jesus wanted me to have those things, and you reassured me that He does. He obviously wants me to be happy, but He also wants to know me. And I want nothing more than to know Him.


    1. Alexus,
      Wow, girl! It’s so awesome to see how the Lord is working in your heart. Praise Him! Yes, He is glorified when our hearts are joyful in Him and in His blessings. I pray He would constantly bring you closer to His heart! Much love to you, my sister!


  23. Well said, Melissa. So much soundness there! Thank you for giving voice to many with your fresh transparency. You said what many thought but may have been afraid to say out loud.
    “Since you were brought back to life with Christ, focus on the things that are above– where Christ holds the highest position” Colossians 3:1. GW
    I look forward to reading more from your heart focused on Christ!
    ❤️ Kathy


  24. This post is so spot on!! I could not agree more with your perspective. I am a teenage girl who has all of those same dreams but at the end of the day it’s all about Jesus, like you said. I also have a blog tbspofjoy.weebly.com would love to have you read what I have!!


  25. Thank you for sharing this. I have experienced the proposal, the wedding, the kids, and some travel and now I want to see my kids get married, I want to meet and love on my grandkids. There will always be things that I want to experience at all stages of life. I know that meeting Jesus and living in his presence will be more than any words I have, but sometimes my head gets in the way, because I am human. Again, thank you, I needed to read this today.


    1. Janae,

      What an exciting and joyful life! Such blessings by the Lord. I read a phrase yesterday, “But the reality is, after sitting in Jesus’ presence for even a minute we would never yearn to go back to our old life.” It really hit me. Hope it does to you, too. Thank you for your support and encouragement. Much love to you, my sister!


  26. Thank you so much for this post. As an 18 year old girl whose felt selfish and guilty for desiring a husband, family, and good life, it’s lovely to hear that wanting those things is ok and normal. It isn’t wrong as long as you want Jesus more. Your blog is so inspirational.


  27. Melissa,
    I so appreciate your boldness in writing this. It is such an encouragement & a blessing to me, as I continue to diligently seek the Lord with my heart in this time of singleness, & transition from college to ‘real world’.
    May you continue to write & publish as the Lord leads you, & may He bless your journey & obedience to Him 😍


    1. Awh Hannah!!
      Thank you so much for your sweet words of encouragement! I am so touched by them- I pray that God would shower your heart in so much of His sweet love that it just pours out of you at every second. May He bless your adventure into the “real world!” Thankful for you!!
      Much love to you, my friend!


  28. I’ve been struggling with these thoughts lately and could never really put them into words to explain them. But you did exactly that! Thank you for the encouragement and reassurance through all of this. He is the one I desire most!


  29. This is exactly what I had to learn. As I said in a previous comment, I have just recently broke up with a girl after being with her for nearly a year. I was doing everything wrong. I had made her the number one priority in my life and didn’t live the like God has called me to live. It took her leaving me to break my heart and give in to God and give him my heart and trust that he can be my ultimately provider of joy! That if I put him number one in my life then everything else will be blessed upon me. But I need to stop making it happen on my own. I need to just seek Jesus and grow in my relationship with him and everything else will happen in His time! God bless!!


    1. Tim,
      I am so glad that the Lord was working in your life and in your heart through it all. Praise Him for stretching you, growing you, and making you more like Him, even through discomfort and trial! It’s true that we just need to seek Jesus and that everything else will happen in His timing. Blessings!


  30. Reblogged this on thepassionateflower and commented:
    This post is so beautiful, and it really made me think about the desires of my heart and what I want to gain out of this life. It was an awesome way for me to really reflect on the goodness of the Lord and on his promises. He alone can satisfy my heart. He alone can bring me joy and peace. In Him alone can I find my happiness. It’s hard to remember to seek him first sometimes, especially when it comes to MY future plans. But I think the most courageous thing to do is give it all to Him and lean on Him, always.


    1. Sydney,
      Wow! Thank you for reblogging this and for your sweet words. Yes, only the Lord will satisfy and it brings us great, great joy to seek Him first! Matthew 6:33, “But seek first His kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”
      SO much love to you!

      Liked by 1 person

  31. Dearest Melissa,
    Thank you for your incredible words about our sweet Savior. I have personally read and reread this many times over, and have shared it with so many of my friends. It truly touches my heart every time, and so accurately depicts how much I want Jesus, and how I WANT to want Jesus more than anything on this earth.
    I never want to be a “But, first…” kind of girl. You know, that one that says, “Sweet Jesus, come home, but first, let me get married.” Or, “Beloved Jesus, please come quickly, but first, let me have kids.” The desire for me to finally be with Him has to be so much greater than my desire for the earthly things.
    One of my favorite quotes is actually something my grandfather (the kindest man on the planet) told me. “Christy, you have to live with a heavenly mentality, but a good head on your shoulders and your feet on the ground.” I want the glory of Heaven to be my greatest motivation, my sole longing. Everything else falls into place when it is.
    Thank you, again.


    1. Christy,
      WOW! Love this! All of it. First off, I am so glad that you loved the post. I am praising God that He used it to work in your heart. Such a great line that you said, “The desire for me to finally be with Him has to be so much greater than my desire for earthly things.” So true! Also, the quote from your grandfather is so good! Heavenly mentality, but a good heard on your shoulders and feet on the ground. Such a good line to live by. So encouraged by your sweet words. Keep on lettin’ Jesus love you. Much love to you, my friend!


  32. My 19 yr old daughter posted this and I was truly surprised. I, as a child, was baptized when I was 7 at bible camp and still have the bible they gave me signed by my pastor with my name in gold on the cover. I grew up in church all my childhood. I lived the Christian life and put God first. I couldn’t wait for the church bus to pick me up on Wednesday nights and my aunt to get me ready for Sunday service. I always had the prettiest dresses and I was taught how to behave and listen in church. I was raised by old fashioned aunts, a bunch of uncles and 2 older brothers along with the best grandparents a child could ask for. My mother was not a church going person but she prayed and believed in him. She was a southern baptist. I didn’t k ow the difference then and still don’t to this day. When I was 8, my mother married my 2nd step dad whom aas a control freak and alcoholic. I wasn’t allowed to attend church anymore unless my aunt picked me up or I said I was going to my friends house and went on Wednesday evenings. It had got to the point I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere except my grandparents house. So, I lost connection to the church and I thought God. My step dad hit my mom and I witnessed things a child should not have to see. I lost my way with God. I am not 41 and I have been back in church since I was 19! Sure, I have stumbled along the way and did not live the way God wants us too but I still pray and believe in him. I believe I was put in this earth to help others and that is exactly what I do.
    Thank you so much for this article. No matter what, God will always have my back and be there for me.


    1. Katie,
      Wow! What an inspiring story.. thank you for sharing! It’s so true that God will always have your back- your life is a living proof of that. God loves you so so dearly, and has always been pursuing you. He loves it when you pray to Him, and spend time with Him! Keep it up, my friend! You’re awesome. Much love.


  33. “Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full on His wonderful face; and the things on earth will grow strangely dim …. in the light of His glory and grace.””


  34. This has made my heart smile so big!!! I have experienced ALOT of these life-times (events). Some not so happy at all, ALOT/MOST were joyful, exciting, beautiful, life-changing. How do i follow your blog(posts)?????

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kelly,
      Awh I love that- it made your heart smile! SO sweet! Thank you for your sweet words.. they made ME smile! haha! To follow the blog, if you have a WordPress account, you can click the “follow” button that should pop up in the bottom right corner. If you want to get an email everytime a blog is posted, shoot me an email at mysweetjesusblog@gmail.com!
      Much love to you!


  35. You have a sweet spirit and heart, going in the right direction. For more than 35 years I’ve had all of that. It hasn’t been perfect. We all fail at life. But because of Jesus it has been perfectly beautiful.

    Liked by 1 person

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